The Conflict (W.E. 09)

For those of you who don't know, this is a blog about writing exercises. These exercises I've found around the web and may possibly come up with on the spot. This is just for fun and to get me into the habit of writing frequently. I hope you will join me on this journey of writing. I will be posting every Tuesday and Friday as long as I have steam to do so. 


Exercise 09:

One of the important things in good prose writing is to have more than one thing happening at once. In this exercise, describe a kiss, taking your time and trying to visualize the action clearly and precisely. However-- have something else going on at the same time.  Maybe one person is thinking of a different boyfriend, or perhaps someone's leg is falling asleep, or maybe one person is worried about the garlic pizza he had for dinner.....

The Conflict

Her lips were so unexpectedly upon mine. The last thing I wanted was to be kissing my best friend right now. Her lips, soft and warm in a way that I couldn’t have ever imagined, it wasn’t repulsing. It wasn’t something I ever thought of until this very moment. But here she was kissing me right at this very moment. My lips respond back to hers and I’m unsure why. Perhaps it’s from the idea that I don’t want to make her feel rejected knowing damn well how much it hurts to be rejected.

My mind screams at me to stop this madness. A woman kissing another woman is revolting. It’s against all that god has written in the bible. Man shall not lay with man for Christ sake; does that not include a woman kissing another woman in such an intimate manner?

I could feel her hand upon my cheek holding me there as she intensified the kiss. I felt my face beginning to flush, and my mind became a little hazy. Was I enjoying this?

I knew that if I kept up this crazy charade that I would find myself in the depths of hell burning for all eternity. I cared about my afterlife, so why couldn’t I stop kissing her back? I cared about her feelings and knew that if I shoved her away as roughly as I wanted to, that she would feel great pain. Not the pain of physical punch, but the pain of a broken heart. I was having conflicting desires between what was right and what was wrong.

I found my right hand gripping the collar of her t-shirt, keeping her in place. I felt my lips responding. I felt my entire body, my entire being responding to her. Her sins were tempting me down a road from which it’s too late to turn away from.

I want so badly to shove her away, for her to stop responding to me. I wanted her to vanish from this very place and time for making me unable to resist her in such sinful ways. But she just wouldn’t stop.

I found her pushing me on the bed, and my mind was screaming no but my body was screaming oh yes.

Then in an instant it was over. Her lips were no longer on mine and she was looking down at me. Her face seemed expressionless. She didn’t seem pleased, nor did she seem unhappy. She seemed simply empty. A word wouldn’t escape my lips, and she seemed to have nothing to say either.

Why did you stop kissing me? What did I do wrong? Are you angry with me? Are you sad with me? What’s going on? I thought and I couldn’t stop wondering as she just stared at me. Then it occurred to me that I was enjoying such a sinful act and I started to feel sick to my stomach.

Then she got up without a word and walked out. I just lay there on my bed for a few moments wondering if she would return, and then I heard the sound of her car starting up and I knew she was leaving. I got up quickly and rushed to the window just in time to see her driving off. On a normal day I wouldn’t have noticed. I would have never rushed to the window to see her pulling away. But something in me changed.

What the hell just happened?

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Authors Notes:

I just went with the idea of a religious woman being repulsed by the concept of homosexuality due to belief. But obviously she learns something about herself that leaves her entirely confused about her friendship and possibly what she really believes in. If anyone wants to continue this one, feel free to. I thought it would be best left in confusion. 

It's a representation of the confusion we all feel inside of us about this or that. Sometimes the world seems so clear to us, but then something unexpected happens and throws our world off balance. I hope you can in some way find this as something you can relate to.

This exercise was quite fun. It led me in a very unexpected direction. I don't know where the idea came from. Sometimes I just read exercises and certain ideas become triggered.  I guess I'd call these exercises catalysts.

Some of the best things in writing can be conflicting thoughts, feelings and emotions. This short story is a quick representation of this.

By the way if anyone knows of any other really cool ideas for writing exercises tweet them to me @lylathewicked